taylor swift

sunday kind of love… taylor swift

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'Cause baby now we got bad blood You know it used to be mad love So take a look at what you've done 'Cause baby now we got bad blood (Hey) now we got problems And I don't think we can solve them You made a really deep cut And baby now we got bad blood (Hey) did you have to do this I was thinking that you could be trusted Did you have to ruin what was shining now it's all rusted Did you have to hit me where I'm weak baby I couldn't breathe I rubbed it in so deep Salt in the wound like you're laughing right at me Oh, it's so sad to think about the good times You and I 'Cause baby now we got bad blood You know it used to be mad love So take a look at what you've done 'Cause baby now we got bad blood (Hey) now we got problems And I don't think we can solve them You made a really deep cut And baby now we got bad blood (Hey) did you think we'd be fine Still got scars on my back from your knife So don't think it's in the past These kind of wounds they last and they last Now did you think it all through All these things will catch up to you And time can heal but this won't So if you come in my way, just don't Oh, it's so sad to think about the good times You and I 'Cause baby now we got bad blood You know it used to be mad love So take a look at what you've done 'Cause baby now we got bad blood (Hey) now we got problems And I don't think we can solve them You made a really deep cut And baby now we got bad blood (Hey) band-aids don't fix bullet holes You say sorry just for show You live like that, you live with ghosts (ghosts) Band-aids don't fix bullet holes (hey) You say sorry just for show (hey) You live like that, you live with ghosts (hey) Hm, if you love like that blood runs cold 'Cause baby now we got bad blood You know it used to be mad love So take a look at what you've done 'Cause baby now we got bad blood (Hey) now we got problems And I don't think we can solve them (think we can solve them) You made a really deep cut And baby now we got bad blood ('Cause now we got bad blood) 'cause baby now we got bad blood You know it used to be mad love So take a look at what you've done (look at what you've done) 'Cause baby now we got bad blood (woah) Now we got problems And I don't think we can solve them You made a really deep cut And baby now we got bad blood.
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look at what you’ve done
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve them
You made a really deep cut
And baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) did you have to do this
I was thinking that you could be trusted
Did you have to ruin what was shining now it’s all rusted
Did you have to hit me where I’m weak baby I couldn’t breathe
I rubbed it in so deep
Salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me
Oh, it’s so sad to think about the good times
You and I
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look at what you’ve done
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve them
You made a really deep cut
And baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) did you think we’d be fine
Still got scars on my back from your knife
So don’t think it’s in the past
These kind of wounds they last and they last
Now did you think it all through
All these things will catch up to you
And time can heal but this won’t
So if you come in my way, just don’t
Oh, it’s so sad to think about the good times
You and I
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look at what you’ve done
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve them
You made a really deep cut
And baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) band-aids don’t fix bullet holes
You say sorry just for show
You live like that, you live with ghosts (ghosts)
Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes (hey)
You say sorry just for show (hey)
You live like that, you live with ghosts (hey)
Hm, if you love like that blood runs cold
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look at what you’ve done
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
(Hey) now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve them (think we can solve them)
You made a really deep cut
And baby now we got bad blood
(‘Cause now we got bad blood) ’cause baby now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look at what you’ve done (look at what you’ve done)
‘Cause baby now we got bad blood (woah)
Now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve them
You made a really deep cut
And baby now we got bad blood.

i never meant to like taylor swift. she’s not necessarily in my wheelhouse. but i do admire tenacity. and good will. and good manners. and it seems she has all those and more.

however i do love the ryan adams tribute album to taylor swift’s 1989. and listen a lot. i have friends who’ve been fans of ryan’s for some time and i never got it until now. anyway this is a sunday kind of love post for taylor swift. she may not need it. but it feels great to be kind.

lifted from janis ian’s fb page:

Just watched Adele’s new video. Brilliant. Love the flip phones, love the “old love interest”. Love the music.
Here’s what I don’t get. The posts saying things like “Sorry, Taylor, Adele wants her throne back.”
I happen to be a big Taylor Swift fan. I think she’s shown enormous grace under enormous pressure. She’s one of the most generous performers out there, not just with her money but with her time – and lots of both are unpublicized.
In addition, she’s a brave writer and recording artist. She’s matured in a goldfish bowl, as I did, and she’s done a much better job of maintaining her sanity than I did in my teens. Not to mention her stunning professionalism.
Likewise Adele. First time out, the hugest record of the year. Second time out, ditto. Brave? Walked away so she could have a life for a while, sort it through, figure out where she was going and where she wanted to be.
The way I see it, the two women have a great deal in common.
So why the perception that there’s any kind of competition here?
Personally, I think it’s a “female thing”, and it disappoints me that women are contributing to it. You don’t see posts like “Sorry, Elton, Bruce wants his throne back” do you? Or catty comments when two male artists are both having hit records?
I find it stunning that the top two selling artists right now are women who write their own music and direct and arrange and co-produce and produce and don’t apologize for any of it. I just do NOT understand why anyone would think they’d be in competition in that snarky, mean way.
I don’t know either of these women, but I can tell you as a female artist, we don’t need to be tearing one another down. We need to be helping one another stand up, and showing pride in each others’ accomplishments.

broken record

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“My collection is so disorganized right now, it’s terrible. But usually it’s split into two sections: ‘hip-hop’ and ‘not hip-hop’” – Cosmo Baker
“My collection is so disorganized right now, it’s terrible. But usually it’s split into two sections: ‘hip-hop’ and ‘not hip-hop’” – Cosmo Baker

What are the Signs of Emotional Sobriety?
•  Ability to regulate strong emotions •  Ability to regulate mood •  Ability to maintain a perspective on life circumstances. •  Ability to regulate potentially harmful substances or behaviors •  Ability to live in the present •  Ability to regulate activity levels.

•  Ability to live with deep, intimate connection.

•  Resilience, the ability to roll with the punches

•  Ability to regulate behavior….tian dayton phd

this emotional sobriety thing becomes so friggin perplexing at times, that my mutterings the blog o sphere must seem like a broken record. it is said that life is a spiral which has us circling around and revisiting the same place as we try to ascend to the next level. this week brought me once again to a place that causes me to believe this theory to be true. for me, surviving the trauma that i have done has left imprints and some scars. i feel unlovable and broken as a first response to situations at times and then must steer my thinking and my my perceptions to a different place that holds more light. it takes some and it takes some damn presence of mind. it feels like a broken record, but i’m starting to believe the record is not broken but only scratched. (impish and joyful smile here)

“According to ancient philosophy life is not a cycle  but a spiral. Every life lesson that has ever been presented to you will come back again, until you learn it. And the stakes each time will be higher. Whatever you have learned will bear greater fruit. Whatever you failed to learn will bear harsher consequences.

” Midlife is our second chance […] Whatever didn’t work in your life before this part, was a reflection of the fact that you hadn’t yet integrated the different parts of yourself.  Where you didn’t  yet accept yourself, you attract lack of acceptance. 

“If you want to spend the years you have left reenacting the old drama of the past – you can. The same script be indeed coming around for your review. But if you want, you can take the script, and give it an awesome rewrite.”  – Marianne Williamson “THE AGE OF MIRACLES”

i managed to avoid running which is my go to move. instead i reminded myself that i deserve to see things through a little further. i can’t really say whether progress is happening, but i am aware of a connecting thread that began in my past and has infiltrated my adult life. that thread has survived decades of volatility and helped keep me alive when sane thinking would have guessed otherwise.

i may not be well, but i’m certainly getting better and i’m grateful. really really grateful.

The drought was the very worst
When the flowers that we’d grown together died of thirst
It was months, and months of back and forth
You’re still all over me like a wine-stained dress I can’t wear anymore

Hung my head as I lost the war, and the sky turned black like a perfect storm

Rain came pouring down when I was drowning
That’s when I could finally breathe
And by morning gone was any trace of you,
I think I am finally clean

There was nothing left to do
When the butterflies turned to dust that covered my whole room
So I punched a hole in the roof
Let the flood carry away all my pictures of you

The water filled my lungs, I screamed so loud but no one heard a thing

Rain came pouring down when I was drowning
That’s when I could finally breathe
And by morning, gone was any trace of you,
I think I am finally clean
I think I am finally clean
Said I think I am finally clean

10 months sober, I must admit
Just because you’re clean don’t mean you don’t miss it
10 months older, I won’t give in
Now that I’m clean I’m never gonna risk it

The drought was the very worst
When the flowers that we’d grown together died of thirst

Rain came pouring down when I was drowning
That’s when I could finally breathe
And by morning gone was any trace of you,
I think I am finally clean

Rain came pouring down when I was drowning
That’s when I could finally breathe
And by morning gone was any trace of you
I think I am finally clean
Finally clean
Think I’m finally clean
Think I’m finally clean…taylor swift

and here is that taylor swift song recorded by ryan adams on his tribute album “1989”

shake it off

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If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away. Henry David Thoreau
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.
Henry David Thoreau

it’s taken about a week, but i really believe i’ve come to terms (again) with the pitfalls in my own sense of survival. now if i could only work on my picker. i must have a damaged picker. i learn things from my poor decisions undoubtedly, but i admit i could very easily get used to making less poor decisions. perhaps in the next life.

maybe i trust too easily. i often listen to what people are saying- and listen to what my reaction is while that is being said. somehow though, my natural affinity to decipher caca becomes dwarfed by my eagerness to please with a big dash of let me do what i love. and when that happens, i somehow enter into relationships that will not meet my expectations nor tickle my satisfaction bone for very long.

so, like a foolish teenager i find myself on a lot of “first dates” and walk away scratching my head. frankly it’s tedious. and i am ready, oh spirit guide, to move past this lesson and on to the next level in my game.

one think i do believe is that i do not have to do this perfectly. so just like taytay sez:

I stay up too late, got nothing in my brain
That’s what people say mmm, that’s what people say mm
I go on too many dates, but I can’t make ’em stay
At least that’s what people say mmm, that’s what people say mmm

But I keep cruising, can’t stop, won’t stop moving
It’s like I got this music in my body and it’s gonna be alright

‘Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play
And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off…Taylor Swift

here’s to any good reason to rock a lip sync or 2

 

it’s vertigo

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But I keep cruising Can't stop, won't stop moving It's like I got this music In my mind Saying, "It's gonna be alright." 'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off I never miss a beat I'm lightning on my feet And that's what they don't see, mmm-mmm that's what they don't see, mmm-mmm...... taylor swift
But I keep cruising
Can’t stop, won’t stop moving
It’s like I got this music
In my mind
Saying, “It’s gonna be alright.”
‘Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play
And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off
Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break
And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake
Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off
I never miss a beat
I’m lightning on my feet
And that’s what they don’t see, mmm-mmm
that’s what they don’t see, mmm-mmm…… taylor swift

 

and i’m pretty sure i’ve got it..